heathermassoth

You can't doing everything everyday!

Anarchy

What if we all thought the same.  What would that same be?  What if everyone thought about that zombie-life.  Or do we follow the thought pattern of totalitarian religious ideas?

That being said, it’s safe to say, we are not all thinking the same thing all the time.  While sitting in traffic, the lady in front of you may be thinking about her recently deceased mother, while the person in front of her is streaming music/movie/porn on their iPhone .

Those who meditate on fantasma or video games, relish in that make-believe; making real life look pretty boring. Those who meditate on higher things have a higher purpose.  If only to discipline one’s mind, or attempt purity of thought.  #bhagavad #gita #holyones.

Knowing that not everyone is thinking the same thoughts all the time, helps us be more compassionate towards each other.  Because we don’t know what others are thinking. Be free to think. Being mindful of your thoughts. #mindfulness.  Remembering that others have their own. (way of thinking).

But wouldn’t it be great if everyone thought like you?   (Gosh I hope not.  When I think about some of the things other people think about!)

http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/anarchy

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This may not apply to the corporate structure.  In the business world, being unified in thought and process is essential. We tend to share and agree on thoughts and ideas regarding business dealings. But in the workplace, on a daily meditative basis, others are not always on the same page as you.  You are googling different things…(your individual life’s necessities) and not always clapping in response to today’s lecture. IOW, people go back to thinking thier own thougths after “the lecture”.

 

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Remember when…

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We all have experience times of change and growth.  It is really easy to recognize in others.  I/e. “Oh, I remember when I liked horses”, and you had all the gear, cozy pants and a new bridle.  Or “I remember when I hung out at Starbucks, sitting there on the comfy couch feeling all nostalgic, retro, and romantic”, and “I remember when my kids were that age”, and you think back to how you are not that person anymore.

It may be easier to recognize our stages of growth in others, because we have a difficult time looking at ourselves.  It’s natural to not turn the periscope on ourselves.  Ooo!  Ouch!  But in others, we say, “I remember when that was important to me”.

  • going to church
  • going to work on time
  • speeding through traffic
    • cuz you’re  young
    • cuz you’re late
  • new baby stage
  • THe dating era

And when we see others there, in that place, we get to quietly reminisce, hate, judge, razberry their moment, or revel in the joy of the memory.

Everyone experiences different stages of growth and yet we tend to insist, we haven’t changed at all.  Are we the same person we were at 18, 28 or 32?   Some admit to changing and are glad for it!

“Thank God I’m not that hectic, rebellious immature young adult anymore!”  “Thank God there is not a baby in the house waking me at all hours of the night anymore” and “Thank God I found this person, so I am not sitting on this park bench alone in my maturing, grateful- to- be- alive years.”  Finally, for the old folks and retirees, “Thank God, the children are all ok and don’t need me anymore”.  “I remember when we were busy and couldn’t  share the holidays with my folks!”  So the old folks respect admire and allow us 30 and 40 something room to grow and get those kids off to school.  But just remember, they remember those times too.  Not only might they have advice or words of wisdom, we can all share in the silent surrender of being glad we are not in that person’s place in life anymore, or yet, but still be compassionate towards those that are in “that place”, knowing you survived it, and just take a moment to pity their plight.

Learning compassion is just taking a step back AND PUTTING your self in other people’s shoes.  You don’t have to do it all the time or be constantly sympathetic to other’s bad behavior, aggression, and evilness… But do consider their place in life on their journey and considering they may be struggling with some change or transition.  Silently observe, to feel kindness and compassion in your own heart, even if you can’t relay it or lend a helping hand.

But for those that are open to suggestion, offer up those words of encouragement… that “it will be over soon, and your gonna miss this.  You’ll look back and remember these were the days. ” And somehow be glad you’ re no longer there and in it.  Observing others when you miss those times; kids in the park, nursery at church, attending a wedding; brings back those moments from your life into your current memories and feelings without having to truly experience it again.

 

For all those 40 something new moms:  You see now that maybe you should have just volunteered at the church nursery or spent a few years in a day care center to get over the hump of missing that stage, when your older kids were young.  But we all know, observing you, that there is magic and joy in the happiness of childhood nothing can replace.

We are all just glad someone else is doing it, and we’re not in that place anymore.

Thanks to all of you offering us “observers”, moments to reminisce and be glad for our current plight in life, or by giving us something to look forward to.  I/e.  You old folks sitting on a park bench!  You know who you lovers are!

 

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grander you

Every opportunity is a new opportunity to be the bigger, better you.  The more practice and experience you gain in making the most of every moment, every interaction, every confrontation, the more comfortable you’ll be in your new skin.  The more obvious petty moments sound. The more obvious petty people are. The more obvious that everything is a petty ccomplaint.

When you recognize the connectivity of it all, the more petty our daily bumbles seem.

The grander life is.

The grander our purpose is.

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Pipe Dreams

Obviously, there is a huge difference between “pipe dreams” and realizing or manifesting soul purpose.  When you feel it, know it, and are living it, there is no turning back; no being wrong about it.

Follow a pipe dream first, as practice. (if you have the time).   Learn the curves, hurdles and ins-and-outs of making something happen out of nothing.  See how hard it is.  Experience that resistance, the negative feedback and lack of time allowable.  That’s how you know it’s not life purpose.  By not coming naturally, authentically, with assistance, support, positive feedback and an incredible amount of support that just seemingly appears out of thin air.   People come out of the woodwork. People you begin to meet that are connections in the field of interest. The difference is to be felt and experienced, so you know you are doing the right thing. The thing that feels right.  More than filling a void of boredom or escapism, it explodes out from inside of you.

Letting your inner child come out and play with the fire trucks, hammers, tools; your true purpose may reveal itself.  Following an old pipe dream or picking up a special or new hobby, allows time to concentrate and look inward, while hiding behind the work.  Whether it be exercise, an experiment in the basement, a project on line.  Searching for purpose requires quiet time alone.  In these moments of catering to your soul and listening to spirit, you can have the conversation, with self, about what your dreams are trying to tell you.

Quiet time; or concrete, dedicated time; on a “hobby” lets us hear about the action to take, while alert and awake, uninterrupted by the noise of the world.  Wake up from the humdrum of the daily grind, and get into your workshop; whether it’s the garage, the garden, the tennis court, the golf field, or your daily run.

Hobby takes our mind off the mundane.  Move it forward into life purpose; with dedicated thought and conversation with self.

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Frame of Mind

It could be said, that it all is just a frame of mind.

Whether we’re happy/sad, angry/ vengeful, pleasant/cordial, social or unsocial.

What puts you , in what frame of mind?

To find this out takes a little reflection and inward conjecture.  Conjecture because were never truly done unraveling the workings of the mind.  But it is a fun little mind-wrestle to work out what’s going on today. What’s causing our behavior or reaction to certain situations.

Some people don’t like time alone.  You’d be surprised how long 5 minutes really is.  The second hand gets pretty loud, when your timing yourself a short 5 minutes on concentrating.  Spending time alone, inwardly reflecting on improving oneself, can be painful, lengthy and long.

It is not a waste of time to consider your frame of mind at all times.  Whether you realize it or not, you are going to spend the rest of the 12 or 18 hours left in this day spent thinking of yourself; what you want and what you need, solving problems… it just won’t be mindful.

It’s just not productive, (to think of oneself all day) if that action is not producing desired outcomes.

  • Improving oneself
  • Helping others
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Achieve Balance with Opposites

Opposites Attract and Achieve balance.  A happy middle-ground.

If you are a watcher and tend to lack “taking action” – you may need to practice DOING, in order to achieve change.

A slight change in your outlook on life, the outlook of the room, the outlook on dinner, could be doing something you don’t normally do.  Act instead of observe.

On the flip side, if you are always taking action and a take charge kinda gal (or guy), warn everyone around you that you are trying something new in the month of (your choice of change).  You are going to sit back and listen at dinner, let your husband order for you (Ohhhhhh!)  and maybe see what the children want to do on a Saturday rather than have a plan.

Practice being uncomfortable with the opposite of your normal for a set amount of time.  Go back to your old ways!  But they won’t fit so well, and you will have a new outlook on life.

Try opposite day for a month and see how it changes your perspective on life and people around you.  You will experience strangers, co-workers and family members in a whole new way.

This technique  (once a year, once in a while…) opens your eyes and sets new highs for old lows.  It’s fun and adventuresome.

Feel free share your learning curve, picture proof or your story, here.  Fresh insight using this technique can be shockingly amazing!

Note:  Change is a chapter in my book Compassionate Communication.

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Apathathetic Sea of Sad

The Apathy in this world is outrageous. The younger generation perpetually chanting “No one cares”.

They seem to not care about school, manners, the future, the state of the world or their country.

When you consider no one cares.  What difference does it make what you do?

Consider then that what you do does matter to YOU, your future, who you are, what you will do, what you will be.

Where you will place your personage?  Deliberately and on purpose.  Be purposeful with what you do!

Especially if no one cares, what difference does it make if you choose to be better, rise above and perfect your actions?

Go ahead and be better.  The big “they” don’t care if you wallow in filth or flounder like a fish out of water.

It’s one thing for you not to care about others, or that others could care less about you.

But don’t you care about you?  Where you put your feet, what you eat, when you go to bed.

Where in your brain do you find peace, happiness and joy?…Do it on purpose and with mindfulness.

If for no other reason than no one else cares.  Shouldn’t you?

An expansion on this chapter on Apathy in A Course to Center.

Find Compassionate Communication available now:

book

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